The Pacifier

(Adam Shankman, USA, 2005)

The crucial publicity image for this film – big, tough Vin Diesel as a reluctant baby-minder – makes it seem like a close cousin of the contemporaneous Ice Cube comedy Are We There Yet? (2005). But the novelty element in Adam Shankman’s The Pacifier is its attempt to mix such domestic catastrophe into a lightly violent, action-espionage plot.

Lieutenant Shane Wolf (Diesel) is given a rest from his usual assignments in the field, in order to mind five children. They need protection from the nasty Serbian agents who are after the secret device created by their late father. There is nothing about to happen on this international-intrigue side of the movie that cannot be guessed within the first few minutes.

But the mystery plot is really just an excuse that allows Wolf to militarise his unruly household of misfits. Barking out commands like “We are doing it my way, there is no highway option!”, he whips these kids into shape. Martial arts lessons and punctuality drills are combined with self-esteem boosts and life advice.

This is a paper-thin film, and Diesel rarely seems at ease occupying the essential pivot-position between action and comedy. But it is amusing to watch elaborate segments based around an amateur production of The Sound of Music, to hear the familiar screwball banter and timing of Gilmore Girls star Lauren Graham, and to see Wolf softening to the point where he asks a troubled teen boy: “Is performing what makes you happy?”.

MORE Shankman: A Walk to Remember

© Adrian Martin March 2005